I have been waiting for my almost 6 and almost 8 year old girls to ask me how babies are made. They asked as toddlers and got the mommy has eggs and daddy has sperm explanation. I figured at some point they would ask the mechanics but nope.

In general, I have found that explaining things at a young age is so much less awkward. They are more inclined to just accept the scientific realities and move on. Plus I want them to hear it from me and not from classmates. So last night I ripped off the bandaid and explained high level PIV. I stopped short of telling them adults also do this for fun - I’ll save that for a future time. It went really well and life has moved on. But my mom group is divided but a good number of moms SHOCKED and APPALLED that I had this convo with them. They said they are no where near ready to discuss this with their second graders.

Every family is different but just curious what age you did or plan to have this convo with your kids? For those waiting for your kids to ask, at what point do you stop waiting and just tell them?

I was about to throw away the Halloween bucket my daughters happy meal came in since I don’t like accumulating junk, then I remembered reading here that some moms use designated bowls or small buckets when their kiddos get sick. So much easier than trying to race to the toilet and pray they make it.

I hosted my daughter's preschool classmates for a fall play date at our home. We did pumpkin painting. I provided all the art supplies and everyone had to bring their own pumpkins. I also provided food and drinks (chicken fil a minis, fruit, crackers, cheese, egg bites, coffee, and juice) A few other moms brought dessert as well. I also rented a bounce house for the kids. I was expecting 15 kids and I knew a bounce house would fit them all. The kids had so much fun. But towards the end... one mom said this was more than what she was expecting and gave me $20. I still have mixed feelings about this. I understand she was trying to be considerate but I wasn't expecting anything in return. I love to host and I have the privilege to host as well. It's not like she has less than. We both live in the same upscale suburb.

It's wild because I've heard of other moms asking for money for play dates. And I'm over here doing the most and just want everyone to have a good time.

How would you have handled this?

EDIT: I didn't realize the term play date/party mattered. My invitation stated party. I wrote play date on here. I guess as a mom I am extra. What I do for other people isn't my expectation back. If you want to have a party, play date, gathering, or event... just do it! I love this group of moms and kids I hosted so I didn't give it a second thought.

I get the cuteness and the snuggles but I feel so damn guilty at the end of the night when bed time routine was rough or I was waiting for nap time all day.

1. Am I going to regret or feel guilty for feeling like I’m in survival mode most days?
   
2. Any advice for a mom with kids under 5 🥺

I see a lot of posts about people saying it’s good to have a second child and the pros of that… but just wondering if there are any parents out there who just had 1 and DON’T regret it? Would love to know your story!

Very vulnerable post so I’d appreciate if we could keep the snarky comments to a minimum 😆

My (40F) partner (35M) and I have been together 9 years and have a 2 year old daughter. Since she’s been born, it has been nonstop stress and traumatic events. His grandmother passed away, my father passed away, I had to close my father’s business, partner had a falling out with half of his family, we bought a house, car broke down, just literally one battle after another.

We have both been running on empty it seems, and our relationship hasn’t been a priority. We are perfectly cordial with each other, still have love and respect for one another but it’s been difficult to get our relationship back to a partnership rather than just cohabitating.

I thought moving would help, and it has in a way, but with moving comes a whole new slew of problems. It seems like every time we think we can catch a breath, something else breaks or needs immediate attention.

I’ve taken on all of the household chores for now, my partner takes care of the outside chores, and we both split the evening childcare duties. Our daughter is in daycare 5 days a week so that definitely helps. But, by the time she’s in bed, dishes are washed, tools put away, whatever it is, it’s late and we’re both exhausted (we both work full time as well). We’ve been trying to divide and conquer, but it seems like we’ve just been dividing with no conquering at all.

All that being said, I can’t even remember the last time we were intimate. We’ve been in the new place around 3 months, and it’s definitely been before then. There are days when I’m like “ok tonight’s the night” but by the time night rolls around, we both just end up falling asleep on the couch. It’s a pretty pathetic situation 🥲

Before my daughter was born, we had a very active and wonderful sex life. After I gave birth, I feel almost bashful trying to initiate or bring it up. I’m sure PPD has at least a little to do with it, but I’m past that point now. I just feel so awkward and I don’t know why!

Has anyone been through an extreme dry spell and able to bounce back? I’m not willing to throw away this life we built because we are out of groove right now. I really would love some advice on how to get out of this funk.

TLDR: relationship and sex life has hit a dry period. How do we get back on track?

Anyone else not like bringing their kids to their family’s houses because they aren’t childproofed and they know they will be the only one chasing their kids around the entire time they are there?

What’s worse is when said family says, “you have your hands full” or “mom you’re no fun” as you’re trying to prevent your child(ren) from breaking things in their home and/or hurting themselves.

Kids are under 3 for reference.

In a conversation with my husband he mentioned that he would really love for me to look into developing a hobby. He has many, he likes to golf and game and build things and I don’t share a love for any of those (lol) but I can’t keep doomscrolling for the rest of my life and I too would love to have a nice hobby to unwind to or do in my spare time. The downside is, I am a very artsy girl. It’s a downside for me because anything related does the opposite of relax me. Painting, crafting, sewing, pottery all sounds nice in theory but the moment I start I become very particular and often end up stressed out about it not being perfect etc. I also really enjoy writing and have put writing my novel on the back burner but I’m not ready to write yet because, again, it’s not relaxing for me. It feels like a thing I’m doing to get an outcome/result out of. I have a newborn and a 4 year old so leaving the house isn’t in my cards right now but I’m curious to know if anyone has low stim hobbies they could recommend.

I think she'd let them have whatever if it was offered to them but I'm really blanking on a "healthier" treat and would like to accomodate. It will be Halloween and they don't do trick or treating in our neighborhood so I'd like to offer something fun, but not too bad that it makes mom feel okay about letting her kids eat. Also nothing I have to put too much energy into because I'm already cooking a big ass dinner and making adult desserts lol

I had two kids at 34 and 36 (1st spontaneous, 2nd IUI), then went through years of IVF and ultimately had a third child using an egg donor at 41. I was completely happy with three kids.

My husband and I were not as careful as we should have been thinking there was no way I could get pregnant spontaneously. Well, I tested positive today at almost 43-years-old. I honestly think it won't be viable. My eggs were already poor quality three years ago. I don't even necessarily want another child. I'm just looking for perspectives.

Mine just washed the dishes and wiped the counters without being asked after having a huge blowout fight. Makes me think I should pick a fight just to get the house cleaned now and then!

I went swimming with my 4 year old today. He is a well spoken and curious little boy, who also has a loud voice and is even louder when he is enthusiastic.

We were changing into our swimwear and he was noticing all the stuff I brought. His swimming trunks, his floaties etc. At one point I am completely naked an he yells in excitement: mom, you even brought your vagina!

At that moment I hear someone in another stall burst out into laughter, he was definitely heard by others. 😆

Eta: I wrote kids in the title, but it was just my 4 year old.

OK, so I am a first time mom to a four month old baby boy and I have been struggling making any Mom friends or local Mom friends. We recently moved further away from where my friends lived and even before that I was the first of my friend group to have a baby and get married, which definitely changed the dynamic. I’m not very social. I’m not on Facebook or any of the social medias and I feel typically very uncomfortable posting anything anywhere but I would love some advice or input on how to get past that and actually make some mom friends.

Husband announced after 20 years of marriage that we are to be separated and his dating other women.
He said, he does not care what I think or feel.
We were on the outs for a while, I stopped doing wifey duties as he refused to spend time with me, children or doing household duties. He just spent time on work, gym, hobbies daily. Ignored me asking for help even though working overtime for months.
His on steroids and like a personality switch so selfish and self centred. His moving in a few weeks and I have been civil as have children at home and his accusing me of being in mood and saying we should still be friends.
Have not informed children yet and his asking eldest today if she dislikes him as she don’t talk to him.
Why would she, when his ignored her for months.
He makes me feel like I should be acting like besties and I am wrong for not.
The audacity makes me feel sick.

I am (so lucky) to be a sahm, but I often think - how are working moms doing this?? Between laundry, cleaning, cooking, baby waking at night…how are you guys managing it? And with more than one kid too??
I only have one but want more - HOW? You guys are superheroes!

my sweet 10 month old son has croup for the third time in five months the last two times we had to take him to the ER and they gave him a steroid medication. They gave us a prescription for the medication and said next time he has symptoms just give him the medication at home last night. We gave him the medication because he had the same croup symptoms before he slept a little bit and seems to be doing better but still has the barking cough and some wheezing. I wanted to stay home, but I am a teacher and today is parent teacher conference conferences. I have 22 students. That's all I was thinking about as I was holding my son. He was sleeping on my chest in bed with us and I was crying because I don't wanna go to work but I know it's such an important day but I actually get fired for not coming. No I have a contract and a union thankfully but I also have immense teacher guilt because I work with young student students with special needs and these conferences are really important. Tomorrow is another conference day. I'm seriously considering not coming in tomorrow. If my son still is sick, thankfully he is with his grandma. We do not send him to daycare. mostly I wanted to vent and ask if any other teacher moms were working. Moms in general have had a similar situation ever since I had my son. I really don't care about Work anymore, even though I got into this profession obviously for my love for helping children and working with children with disabilities and their families, but I literally just don't care anymore. I'm doing the bare minimum and I wanna leave this profession immediately. Not sure if this is just hormones or postpartum whatever or if it will get better, but I seriously cannot continue working with young children every day while having a son at home it just doesn't feel right. It's way too emotionally. Taxing any advice for jobs that don't need any emotions for someone with a masters degree and special education, and 10 years of experience lol?

Used talk to text so sorry for grammar or whatever also I am crying.

I guess I'm just venting but I am sooooooo tired of all the fundraisers. For school, for clubs, for rec sports, even more for travel sports, it's never ending!

I'd happily do a cash buyout and I'll happily volunteer where I can. But I don't have anyone to sell to! I don't have family in the area, I work remotely, and my partner has strict rules against selling/fundraising to the staff where he works (it'd honestly be unethical). So Everytime, I'm pressured to sell whatever it is they are pedaling, it reminds me how I don't even have friends to ask. I mean, heck, we joined the clubs to try and meet people! And so anyone I know on a friendly basis is probably selling the same stuff, anyhow. I truly do want to be supportive, but everytime I'm on the hook for selling X# of raffle tickets or chicken dinner tickets I'm reminded that we have no one to show up for us. Then I get extra salty because a buyout option that doesn't include useless junk would be sooooo much easier, but no, I usually have to purchase the actual product, so I'm spending even more. Plus giving so much of my time working these either preparing or hosting or sorting inventory.

It's just really getting me down lately. And it doesn't help that the kids are older and started realizing they can't contribute because Mom doesn't have friends like the other moms do. Ughhhh!

4 months postpartum. I’m still struggling.
I’m so tired. Sometimes I want to run away just for a few days from everything even though I physically can’t because I’m pumping but also because I’ll miss my baby so much.

But I really despise how unfair childrearing is and how our country makes it so hard to have a kid (yes, understand that I wanted kids but that doesn’t mean I can’t talk about how hard it is).

1. My husband mentioned to me he was tired this morning. I told him I can’t sympathize. Maybe it’s because you went out of town for a few days for a wedding and slept well and now your sleep is out of whack. For being out, he offered for me to take a day off for a spa day (first full day off during leave). But all I want to do is get uninterrupted sleep, which I can’t do at home so I need to leave the house.

2. I’ve been sleep deprived since the baby because of postpartum insomnia. Also when he was week 5, he started having severe reflux symptoms - throwing up what looks like half of his milk (which becomes psychological because it’s your breastmilk), can’t sleep for more than 20 min before we need to burp him overnight, piles of laundry (not having an in unit W&D in NYC sucks), etc. Reflux bleeds into so many other aspects like feeding difficulty in addition to sleep disruption. It’s truly the bane of my existence.

3. Even before I feel like myself again, I got an IUD and now bleeding and cramping several days out of the week and considering taking antidepressant. And returning to work in a week.

4. We had to move from California to NYC couple of months ago and specifically to Upper East Side due to work. Childcare costs here are insane. $3-5K for daycare (many which are windowless crib factories) or $4-6K for nanny (if you walk along Central Park or the east river, you’ll see how hard it is to find a nanny whose not on her phone half the time). In any other place in the US, we’d be squarely in the upper middle class. But not in our neighborhood. So I feel small and feel extra guilty that I can’t afford better childcare for my baby.

5. My husband is a doctor - still in training (fellowship). I feel like partners of doctors in training need additional support because not only are they expected to work insane hours, they need to do while being paid peanuts. Even before the baby, I had to take up majority of the household responsibilities. Now, with the baby, I plan to outsource a lot (grocery delivery, meal kit delivery) but I’ll still responsible for most including drop off/pick up of baby, taking baby to doctor’s visits and taking sick days, bedtime routine since his OR cases can run very late.

I get help from my in laws about 2-3 days of the week (though I won’t have that luxury when I go back to work). So I feel guilty that I’m complaining. But at the same time, they aren’t my parents. So I still have to take on the mental load and not having my personal space and that’s draining.

I’m not looking for advice. Just want to vent and not feel so alone.

Some of my favorite childhood Christmas memories are sitting by the tree, listening to Christmas music, and watching movies with my family.

I've got three kids (7, 5, and 3), and the older two are already asking what we're doing for Christmas Eve this year. We usually watch a Christmas movie together and leave cookies out for Santa.

My kids have been really into Frozen lately, so I'm thinking about doing a blue and white theme for the tree this year, maybe with some snowflake decorations. My youngest loves just watching the lights, and I'd like to get all three involved in decorating this year.

What do your kids usually like to do on Christmas Eve? Any ideas for something all three of mine could enjoy together? Frozen ideas are welcome too!

Kiddo is barely 6 and already planning ahead for his 7th birthday lol. He gets it honestly. I've heard of morning birthday parties, but would that still be cool for a 7 year old (1st grader)? We floated the idea of donuts/pastries and juice at like 9:30 or 10am and then some backyard games/activities.

Any opinions? Anyone done a morning party and it worked or didn't work?

Hi all,
I have an almost 2 1/2 year-old daughter. When she was a couple months old, she was diagnosed with downward gaze nystagmus. We had two MRIs and an EEG all of which were clean. Just recently, I’ve noticed her looking down or to the side pretty aggressively and sometimes her eyes twitch. It lasts for 1-2 seconds, too fast for me to even get on camera. She seems to be acting normally, if maybe a little tired or hungry/Hangry. It seemed to be worse before she ate lunch and I haven’t really noticed it after lunch. She’s super advanced language-wise and has stated she does not feel sick. She did get her flu shot last week and I do remember that the nystagmus last time started after a flu shot as well or a vaccine of some sort. I have called her ophthalmologist and obviously will go in and see what they say as well as the pediatrician but I guess I wanted reassurance as it’s kind of scary.

Hi everyone,
My beautiful son is almost 6 months. I returned to work at the end of September and started struggling a couple weeks in. My son has never been a good sleeper and the accumulated sleep deprivation was making it difficult to function. I was crying at work, struggling to complete tasks, and fell asleep at a stop light. After having a panic attack I reached out to my physician and was given a medical note for extended leave (2-3 weeks). I met with my supervisor and she was supportive but I can’t shake the feeling that I’m letting everyone down. I was only back at work for a few weeks before burning out. It’s hard not to compare myself to other people who seem to be “handling” work and postpartum better.

In the past week my son has finally started sleeping longer stretches at night, (from 10+ wake-ups to 2!) so I’ve started getting more sleep. Any folks who have dealt with similar feelings? I like my job and want to feel like I can work and parent.

Hi! My LO is 16 weeks old, and has been STTN since she was 6 weeks old (with only an about 3/4 nights we've had to help her back to sleep). She has started teething, and over the last almost 2 weeks has barely been taking her bottles, she's formula fed. She just chews on the nipple and swats it out of her mouth. I read that a lower appetite can be common with this.

Sunday night & last night she woke up in the middle of the night (like 4AM ish) and we couldn't get her to go back to sleep so we fed her, because obviously she isn't getting her daytime calories in like she normally does (normally eating 4-6oz per feeding). However, I don't want this to start a cycle of her waking up in the night for food.

I'm also worried about her not eating enough in general, or as much as she used to. This morning, she only ate .5 ounces, so I took little syringes and put them in her mouth just to try to get her more milk in. Has anyone else dealt with this with teething? What should I do? Any advice is appreciated!