I know this sounds mean but my whole family treats my nephew like he's still a baby, and I'm worried if I don't step in he's going to be a failure to launch.

It was his seventh birthday the other week, and of course my family lost their minds, making a special cake just for him, spending the whole week spoiling him, and acting like him being born was some great achievement.

The argument started when it came time for presents, the rest of the family all either got him stuffed toys or snacks that he likes, but I wanted to encourage him to expand himself so I got him a book.

My sister pointed out that he doesn't like books and can't even read, and I replied that that was the problem.

I understand that working full time doesn't give her a lot of time to homeschool him, but she doesn't seem at all bothered by his lack of development.

Here's where I might be the arsehole, my nephew was walking around with a toy in his mouth. ( I understand it's supposed to help when he's overstimulated but it's creepy as hell.) I tried taking it off him and swapping it for the book I bought.

He threw a massive tantrum so I calmly explained that the other people will think he's weird for still chewing toys at his age.

My sister overhead and absolutely lost her mind, apparently he's "perfect" and "I'm just jealous that everyone likes him."

Personally I don't think I'm wrong for refusing to enable him, but my family are blowing up my phone.

I’m at a loss for words here. This has to be fiction right?

But fr, this seems like a women bad post. But the comments are actually calling him on this for wanting to divorce his wife when she is obviously going through something

So much for in sickness and health and working on a marriage...

​

Budhhi chaddi jaise hoti ha ,hoti zaroor ha

Lekin dikhti nahi ha

Bewaqufi bra jaisi hoti ha , dikhana na bhi chaho fir bhi dikh hi jaati ha

Galti pichwade jaisi ,apni kabhi dikhti nahi sirf dusro ki dikhti ha .

Intelligence is like underwear—it's necessary to have it, but it shouldn't be shown.

Foolishness is like a bra—even if you don't want to show it, it ends up showing anyway.

And a mistake is like a butt—you can never see your own, you can only see everyone else's."

Throwaway as I know my main.

For context, when I was 7 there was an electromagnetic anomaly in the airspace above my town, causing a small fixed wing Cessna aircraft to torpedo directly into my living room and killing my father. The doctors described his cause of death as "a carnal supernova." Due to this my mother and I became close but sadly 8 hours later she contracted a rare disease (won't say which one for privacy) that made her head fall off and roll into the garbage disposal.

In her will she left me her wedding dress which I adore. It's made of light cream merino wool, with whalebone corset, taffeta brocade on the chest, a 250cc diesel engine, high collared halter top, off the shoulder design, long sleeves, neon under lighting, a sixteen inch bustle, and a vietnamese child of dubious legal status. Ever since I was old enough to breathe I dreamed of getting married in the dress. My every free moment is spent designing the perfect wedding. It's such a dream of mine I forget to hydrate which I should really do more often as I am almost constantly salivating over my ideal nuptials.

I went to college school and got my master in cinder block design (I want my wedding to be building material themed) and got a job in the dropping masonry off overpasses industry. I've saved up every spare cent I could for my wedding

Enter my cousin "Mia" (20f) To put it kindly Mia is repulsively obese and the villain of this story. In four thousand years of Chinese history she has never stopped complaining that she can't get a boyfriend saying men are too shallow to appreciate a girl with a healthy body. She constantly tells me I am too skinny and nobody will ever date me.

One day she came over to my place and noticed the wedding dress, as I keep it in a glass case in the center of my living room in lieu of a TV. She said "oh what a lovely dress I can't wait to rip it to shreds with scissors and my obscenely corpulent body, is it okay if I borrow it to get it cleaned?" I thought nothing of it at the time and said sure.

Days went by and she always made and excuse how it wasn't ready to be picked up yet. Yesterday I went over to her place to deliver some of her father's mail which is sent to my house for plot reasons. I am under strict orders to barrel through the door without knocking and when I did I saw Mia wearing the dress. Or what was left of it.

She had obviously split it in half trying to force her elephantine bulk into it and take scissors to the rest. In the end all that was left was a loop of cloth draped around her neck like a scarf. (Edit: I looked around for the little vietnamese boy and found his tiny skeleton in the trash can. Apparently my sister had gotten hungry doing blasphemy to my dress and eaten him.)(Edit 2 in my country it's common to call your cousin your sister even if they are male.)

I was furious, I told my cousin or sister or whatever she owed me the cost of a new dress. Last year I had it appraised and it was valued at infinity dollars. She laughed at me and said "I haven't learned the error of my ways, I have fucked around but I surely won't find out." I stormed out.

I hired a lawyer who advised me to ask Reddit for legal advice. Based on that I took her to small claims court. As soon as I presented my side of the story the judge started pounding her judge hammer thing and shrieking guilty guilty. I was so relieved that I broke down cry*ng. The judge comforted me saying she sees thousands of cases like this every day.

Mia's parents had their house confiscated and were turned out onto the street unfortunately they live on a really busy one and it was rush hour so they were pretty much immediately flattened by an out of state bus. Mia was sentenced to 36 years in a labor camp making defective condoms marketed exclusively to enemies of the state.

On hearing of this 64/128 of my friends and family think I was in the right while the other 64/128 said I should have let her have it to "keep the peace" and that it's a dress I was only gonna wear once. I countered that between no fault divorce and the alarming rate of premature deaths among those around me I would have gotten 5 or 6 weddings out of that bad boy.

So, Reddit, AITA?

Edit: to answer some comments and questions I am not the asshole here you callow troglydytes

Edit 2: I wish this was fake but it's my life can one of you comment that this exact thing also happened to you?

Edit 3: yeah

There's so many AITA style posts in our language, complete with a lack of paragraph breaks and unnecessary overexplaining, that needs to be scrutinised.

I think this might be an AITA bingo!

I'm vacillating between "no way is this real" and "something's not right with them kids, these days".

I (32M) have been married to my wife (30F) for four years, and she's currently seven months pregnant with our first child. Recently, my wife has been exhausted due to the obvious, so between that and doing her part in getting ready for our new baby, she's understandably not always in the mood for intimacy. I have my ways, but here's where things get complicated.

My wife caught me in the bedroom having some private time with my own hand. I didn't think it was a big deal because, technically, I wasn't with another human person. However, she got extremely upset and accused me of cheating on her. I laughed at first because I genuinely thought she was joking, but she insisted that I was being selfish for being on my own trying to be intimate and she felt betrayed because I've been hiding it from her. I tried to explain that it wasn’t about her at all, but according to her, it's the secrecy and the fact that I dismissed her feelings instead of having an honest conversation. Now she's barely speaking to me, and when I tried joking that she could also join me and my hand for intimacy if she wanted to, she told me to sleep on the couch.

My mother thinks she's overreacting, while my father says I should apologize because she's pregnant and emotional. I think that's a ridiculous argument because her feelings deserve respect regardless of whether she's pregnant. But I also don't understand how I can be accused of cheating when there was no other person involved.