[22M] So a couple days ago I was taking to this girl that really fascinated me and things have been quite tumultuous between us (I think she’s secretly pan to by how she acts and what she responds to, wish me luck hopefully we date as she might be my first pan GF and I’m so exited about it). But in the process I realized that holy fuck, I’m pan as fuck. I got this realization because traditionally I had crushes on a lot of guys but not much for their bodies but a lot more for their characters. And with girls, I have never been turned on by just their figures. I thought I’d be a mess when my friend first took me to a you know what dance bar and there was this beautiful girl completely dancing in front of me and honestly I couldn’t feel a thing, we spoke later and she let me do a lot of things with her and still no attraction, we didnt yk, do the deed ofc cuz again, wasn’t that into her, but we had a lot of fun kissing and doing other things and the whole time I was not aroused. Just two weeks before that trip to the club I was on a date with a girl I was madly in love with and we were holding hands and I was getting really fluster, we dated for a while later. With this new girl I’m talking to, she’s like 19 now, I was so flustered with her before but briefly she started treating me as a straight man and I’ve been kinda turned off by it but with some new stuff she told me, I think there might be more to it. We’ll see how it goes, if she remains interesting I’ll still be a mess, if not, meh, another person that’s not for me. But I’ve been flustered and distracted with guys too but that’s only when they have something interesting about them. I thought I was just a very noble and unique man yk. But turns out I think I’m pan. I however don’t want to get into a gay relationship because I’ve been around women all my life and I think I can handle them emotionally with great easy and I don’t really care about dating a dude. But I’m pretty happy today. I love you guys so very much. You got a new pan in your cupboard guys and this one’s pretty pretty 🤩

So far starters, I’m straight, but open to exploring sexuality with right people
I have this new 3 month close friend who identifies as pansexual and we’ve going out loads, watching stuff on her bed together, daily messaging, she’s bought me a Christmas present already and I’ve just gotten her a birthday present, and I feel she has been signalling romantic ideas to me, leaning on me, taking about my importance and thankful and complimenting and acting cutesy and blushing
She once brought up something about pansexual and I asked her what it means and she says it’s more about personality

Anyway, she’s spoke a lot about issues with men and such online and irl.
But today she made a post on her TikTok where she streams saying how she wishes men would stop asking her out and that she’s not even straight and they know, in the comments, joking about liking women
This when yesterday she wanted and asked me to go out and had some vague ideas for plans but we both had stuff come up

I know being pansexual isn’t straight, but idk just feels she’s signalling she doesn’t want to be asked or anything
We both have autism, adhd, anxiety and physical disorders and I Apologise for ignorance, just want some insights into this dynamic

Hi Pancake Fam!

Just sharing some Pan Pride from my first community band performance of the season and the fit I had! This is the first time I got to wear all black which had been a shift in performance culture, which I love! (Yay for access and inclusion)! 🎼🎶🎵😄😎 As a nonbinary person this fit gave me so much gender euphoria!

The most chopped pan man of all time but hey I loved this sweater but the jeans don’t match lol

Hey, so there’s a girl at this local coffee shop I go to quite often whom I’ve realised I have a bit of a crush on. I’m still like figuring out my sexuality and not fully ready for a relationship yet like specifically right now, for a few life reasons I don’t want to get into, but I think they’re cute and I really like their style and am interested to get to know them more. I haven’t spoken to them properly, but haven’t wanted to and don’t think that matters. I’m not invested in this as know and am okay with the fact I don’t know them at all.

I wrote a brief, cute note in colored pen saying basically “sorry if this is not appropriate, but I’ve seen you around a few times and noticed [these things] I like about you. I don’t know if you’re seeing anyone, but I’d like to get to know you more. Here’s my number if you’re interested, it’s okay if not!”

Is this okay? I’m feeling very anxious about the idea of doing it. Would it come across as weird? Would you like it if you received this? I know I’m probably overthinking it but I have an anxious disposition!

So last night I had a talk with my partner that made me question where my sexuality sits. I'll start with I'm demisexual and currently identify as bisexual. During this talk I mentioned that my personal view on my sexuality is that I'm attracted to both men and women but that doesn't exclude trans men or women. Then I hit a wall because I realized that I've never been with someone who is gender non-conforming but it's not a hard no for me. Again I'm demi so I must have an emotional bond before I can be physically intimate with someone but I realized that someone can really be anyone as long as that bond is made. Does that make me pan instead of bi?

Just laying here in bed on a Friday night wondering if I am missing anything not being out in the world?

I admit it's been a minute since I have had a social life, but I feel the world just got kinda harsh awhile ago and that just pushed me into hiding.

Does anyone else feel this way?

Literally how I found that I was pan was being in public seeing someone attractive and my head goes : "oh you're hot, whatever gender you are"

Hoping everyone is trying to have a wonderful start to the week.

It is spooky season!! I love playing around with my identity year round but something about creative dress up is so fun. I went to the club this weekend with this outfit. I live in a small town so you already know the type of looks I received. A couple different thoughts went through my head this night and I wanted to share my feelings.

My first thought and the one that matters the most to me is how free I felt in my body. I looked handsome and sexy all while not giving a fluck about another person opinion.

Second thought was how many cis men did a double take on my outfit. No hate because I love queer, but it would be the type of me you’d think would hate crime you. I have a total for 7 men ask for my number that night while we were out for about 2ish hours.

This led to my third thought. If I were to have worn a full suit would those men have treated me differently? If I were a man dressed is a female to male or simply just a female cosplay, how would those men have reacted. I risked getting hate crimed to enjoy myself in my free expression. Yet, I sit in solidarity with all of those individuals who feel like they can’t because of the way others react.

Side bar but there was a moment I almost got hate crimed by an older man who literally look at me like this”🤨🤢” with an undertone of “😏”. IYKYK I gave him a tit bounce and strutted away. He knew I looked good tf.

I only speak on men because as expected all the fems and theys LOVED THE OUTFIT!!

I went out the other day. And I walked past a couple of people I over heard a guy say I looked to intimidating to talk to. So I went over to him and talk to him. I have a nice personality and sweet a heart. I love to make friends. I just think I scare people even tho I don't mean to. Any advice?

You can put your thoughts and ask questions.

Also I know it isn't perfect.

Also sorry if the lighting is bad😅😅

I am 20 male and for a good amount of time now have understood and identify as pan. Recently I've been thinking and I realized that I'm most likely going to date/ marry a women not because I'm more attracted to women but because I want to have kids, and yes i know I there are ways of having kids while being on a male on male relationships but It's different. And I've been questioning my sexual identity as a member of the pan community, I was hoping to get other pansexual peoples opinions on my situation. My question is am I actually pan?

100%

Hey all. I'm a guy in my early 20s, recently come to terms with being pan, and I'd love to get more connected to the community — but I'm pretty introverted and don't really have a framework for how to "get involved." Big loud events feel like a lot for a first step. I connect better doing-a-thing side by side than in crowds.

For folks who were in a similar spot: how did you ease into it? Online spaces, smaller hobby/maker stuff, anything low-key? Also just curious to hear how other pan people found their footing — I sometimes get that "am I even queer enough" feeling and figuring out it's normal would help. Thanks 🙏

do i look like a boy 🥹